Even though tomorrow is actually most likely my last day home from work, today feels like it is. Tomorrow I will be getting up at 0 dark thirty to get to my mandatory nutrition class down at Rose Medical at 8 ack emma. Two hours of diet instruction and then an appointment to see the nurse practitioner in my surgeon's office. I've been looking forward to this.
No lie, actually, we were supposed to have this class last week but they were all out of town at a bariatric conference so my group of bandees didn't get their class last week. We are 2 weeks out. So it will be interesting to see who is eating what. Of course this means I've had an extra week to be home, read other people's blogs, get on lap band forums, and notice just how many different diet programs there actually are, my goodness! It will be interesting to see what my dietician, who teaches this class, will actually tell us. And how I will feel about it when she tells us.
I have a ton of paperwork from my doctor's office. It's in a ring binder, actually, plus a bunch more they gave me when they discharged me. Interestingly, the instructions seem to contradict each other, so I wound up staying on blended foods even though I had originally thought I was supposed to start having soft foods a few days ago because, let's face it, the blended food won't hurt anything and I'm a big ol scaredy cat.
My office wouldn't let me come back to work without seeing the doctor and getting a note saying I'm OK to be back. Besides, I need my lifting restriction in writing since I'm a computer tech and otherwise move computer equipment and the like on a daily basis. I work for a law firm so you can bet everything is by the book. My medical leave is approved by FMLA and covers me till the end of July, which means if the nurse thinks I shouldn't go back yet, I won't be in danger of losing my job. But frankly I think I am ready. Today I feel even better than I have in the previous days. And anyway I've run through all my sick leave and these extra days out are EATING UP MY VACATION, darn it!
So, diet and exercise:
I'm pretty sure the diet restrictions are something like: no junky carbs and no white carbs, keep your protein up, drink your water. And then I just need to know, when do I go to soft foods and how long do I stay there? I'm tracking my foods on "My Fitness Pal", the dorkiest named site. However, they let me add 3 more mealtimes and rename them all to what I want them to say, which is the time I'm supposed to eat them. So I have 6 mealtimes named 7 AM, 10 AM, 1 PM, 4 PM, 7 PM, and 10 PM. And all of the mealtimes show up on the Blackberry App (Spark People would let me add extra meals but they were invisible on the BB App, which is so totally useless OMG).
I already know I can't swim for about another week. My swim suit fits again now that I'm down to 250 though, so that will be good. And since TOM is visiting I wouldn't have wanted to start this week anyway. This means, however, that I actually have to GO to the rec center and sign up. I have everything else except that, though, goggles and a cap and a lock and a duffle bag, and even a black one piece from Wal-Mart in the largest size they have, which pre-surgery I could almost get on my poor ol bod.
I have to find out about massages because my back is killing me, I have a massage envy membership with like, a million unused credits on it, and when I called them they said to ask my doctor when it was ok. Maybe I'll get a note about that too, they are another group of sticklers. I can't wait to get a massage again. I know, it's funny because I'm self conscious about how heavy I am, but I always make sure to shower before I go and it's their job, anyway. I always have great massage therapists who are respectful of my body, and anyway they drape you so only the muscle group they are working is visible to them. If you haven't tried it I highly recommend it.
OK, I admit it. I'm babbling because I'm nervous. Tomorrow I get officially weighed, I see someone who is going to look at my incisions and tell me if my discomfort is normal, and who is most likely going to send me back to my old life. And for several weeks now I've been home, haven't had to wear a bra, and been able to just obsess about what I am eating and if I'd had enough water to drink. She's going to want me to go back to my crazy busy life. And of course she's a bandster herself.
Part of me is afraid she's going to think my discomfort isn't normal, and send me for nasty medical tests. And then of course there's the whole liver biopsy, which my surgeon did because he said my liver looked mottled. Of course by now if I were dying I'd think someone would have called me. But my inner hypochondriac isn't buying that one. The little internal drama queen is insisting that they will tell me in person, and that the entire office has known that I'm a walking dead woman for a week while I don't know yet. Sigh.
Honestly. Sometimes I just would like a vacation from my inner life.
V is coming over late tonight to sleep here and go to my nutrition class with me. Which is really good, because I confess that the idea of driving I25 to 270 at 7:15 AM with no coffee in me is not high on my list of things I want to do for myself. Also he will hear what my dietician says we should be doing. Because he likes to come over and cook! So he will know more about what we need to do. And because, well, he's just an amazing guy and I'm so lucky to have him in my life.
And actually I miss the really wicked awesome people that I work with, and I would like my life back. So this is all a good thing...